- If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
如果你觉得你自己胖，你很有可能真的胖，不用跟我们确认了。
汇男网 www.dddbb.com 汇男网 www.dddbb.com
2.Learn to work the toilet seat; if it's up put it down.
学会使用马桶，如果马桶盖翻起来了就把它翻下来。
3.Don't cut your hair. Ever.
不要剪你的头发，永远不要。
4. Sometimes we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
我们并不是无时无刻地在想你们，你得适应这个。
5.Get rid of your cat.
搞定你的猫。
6.Sunday = Sports.
星期日是运动日。
7.Anything you wear is fine. Really.
你穿什么都还行，真的。
8.Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their breasts stared at.
穿Wonder bra（一个著名的内衣品牌，号称能让胸部变大）和低胸装的女人没有权利抱怨别人盯着她们的胸部看。
9.You have too many shoes.
你的鞋子太多了！
10.Crying is blackmail.
哭泣是一种勒索行为。
11.Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
如果你想要就说嘛，你不说只是暗示我怎么知道你想要呢？
12.Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
在日历上标出所有的纪念日。
13.Yes, urinating standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
没错，站着小便比近距离射程的小便难多了，所以我们有时候难免会失误。
14.Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
“是”和“不是”都是完美的可以接受的答案。
15.A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
持续了17个月的头疼当然是一个问题，看医生去吧。
16.Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
别说谎。我们宁可失败也不愿意被骗。
17.Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
我们6个月或者8个月前说的话是不能在争论时成为证据的。
18.If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
如果你的穿戴不能像那些穿“维多利亚的秘密”的姑娘们一样，就不要指望我们的举止会像肥皂剧里的家伙一样。
19.If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
如果我们说的话有两个理解方式，并且其中的一种会让你生气或者伤心，那么其实我们的意思是另外一种。
20.Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
让我们看看美女吧.如果我们不看别的女人,又怎么能意识到你有多美呢?
21.Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
如果你不想看到灯神跳出来,就不要去擦灯。
22.You can either ask us to do somethingortell us how you want it done - not both.
你可以叫我们去做一件事情，或者你可以告诉我们你想要我们怎么做，二者请只选其一。